Remorse

Alright, updates again.

Recently I've been trying really hard to kill my body by draining so much energy out of it.

For some reason, I just want to make myself so tired and busy the whole day, so my mind will not have time to think about any other stuff. More to be like, "care-free". I think I've been using "tiredness" as an alternative way to keep my mind busy from going into a world I'm not suppose to visit.

I've been filling up my schedules with back to back futsal for hours, so i will die off after that having a nice sleep to wake up the next morning starting anew. Filling up all my free time now with any outings I can think of just to tire myself out. I just have that feeling of getting so tired, then just have a new start again.

I just want to feel as if the world is so peaceful, quiet, motionless, just the symphony of music playing softly above me. I’m not sure if my body can take it, I’m feeling ache everywhere from my hands, body, back, abs, thigh and my entire leg! Excessive futsal maybe. Will be training back with the sparring team soon. Its a good game to release everything out. Something that will test my mind body and soul to the limit.

Cousin came from Aussie for a visit because of her *sister’s* wedding. Her old pal. So she gave me a treat in SHOGUN for lunch on Friday, with all the sashimi in my stomach I went for futsal after that. OMG, every step I make I can feel the stupid sushi in my stomach bouncing everywhere.

Sat, had another futsal session again for 3 hours. Then had a chillax yumchar session with buddies at KAYU and then went home planning to doze off on my bed. Dad suddenly decided we go out for Italian food ! gosh, random, but I LIKE.
Today my dad was like, no feeling towards money, he practically asked me and my sister to buy what every we said it was nice and what we liked. I actually bought this CD which I didn’t expect my dad would pay for it because its 100 bucks ! imported from GERMAN. How nice !

This is KLEE , her album UNVERWUNDBAR.

Imported and cost me 100bucks.
Part of ' Ministry of Sound '
music collection. I'm so happy, so proud.










Attrition ? Compuction ? Sorrow ?
No. Its more like,   REMORSE  that best describes me now. no saying more.
What a word ? check into the dictionary if you really wants to know what it means.